Question: Please tell me how a husband, a believer (a little more religious than his wife), should behave when his wife cannot part with the TV and constantly purchases new clothes.
Answer, Andrey Vdov: If this is a family of ministers, and they have problems of this nature, then the situation can be solved one way. If the situation is different, for example, the wife does not minister, she has just repented and has not yet completely freed herself from the world, then this is a different question.
In any case, firstly, a husband should treat his wife with respect, even if she is somewhere in the wrong position before God. Very often, such situations occur when a wife wants to do the opposite, as if to spite her husband. He, for example, is trying to prove something to her, but she does it as if out of spite, so that he would leave her alone. It’s like a defense, it can be like that.
If, for example, this is a family of ministers, or the husband begins to minister, but the wife has not yet jpined in the ministry, there are several principles that have always operated and continue to operate – firstly, this is the joint prayer of the husband and wife. It is very important that they pray together so that the husband does not prove to his wife that he is right, that he is a believer, and she is a “goat” – sits at home, watches TV, buys clothes, while he plows at work, so that she could buy new clothes for herself. The more he tries to prove, the more he will get the opposite.
If, for some reason, there is a conflict or misunderstanding at home, remember that if someone is the first to make concessions with respect for their opponent, then the second will automatically do the same. But if one tries to prove that “he is right and you are wrong,” she will also believe that she is right and he is wrong. And if the conflict develops further, the more they push against each other, the harder it will be to correct the situation later.
It makes sense for a husband to turn to his mentor for advice on how to behave with his wife in this situation, so that she can hear – because a woman hears with her heart, and if a husband, when communicating with his wife, does not put love and respect for her into his words, she won’t hear him.
Valentin Sviontek: For husbands who have problems with their wives about the fact that they buy a lot of beautiful things – calm down. Do a good deed – take those things that they don’t wear and give them to charity, dress needy people on the street, make her feel good – so that she will say that she has nothing and she needs to buy something new – and do good for yourself that you will get rid of clutter.
Seminar “About this” at the KEMO retreat, 08/28/2013
Source: https://ieshua.org/pro-eto-kak-byt-muzhu-esli-u-zheny-zavisimost-ot-televizora-i-pokupki-odezhdy.htm
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