How to get out of the “pit”. Don´t look at failure

Have you ever missed a good opportunity that was almost in your hands? You went on your first date, everything went great, and the second date never happened? At the interview, the employer seemed to like you, but no one called back? Or you, as happened to me the other day, found a good option for buying a home, your housing issue has already been practically resolved, but someone “stole” your option from you by offering more money.

If so, then you will understand the feeling that I am experiencing these days – I am depressed.

Let’s be honest: no one likes this feeling. But it hasn’t spared any of us. And I’m not talking about depression or some kind of emotional disorder, where the help of a special psychologist is needed. I’m talking about the feeling when the cup of disappointment overflowed beyond measure – the relationship ended, you were fired, a good opportunity was missed. And you’re depressed. You are in “a pit.”

Since these “pits” cannot be avoided, they are part of normal human life, it is very important to come up with a way to get out of the “pit” quickly and on your own. Why? Because sitting in such “a pit” for a long time is a direct road to depression. Yes, and in the pit you not only lose your joy, but also take away the joy of the people around you.

So, follow my thought. Even if you’re not in the “pit” now, get hold of something that will help you get out of it later, when you inevitably find yourself there.

First step: don’t lie

It may seem that the best way to avoid the pit is simply to deny its existence. Ignore disappointments and pretend everything is fine.

But the problem is that it’s not just a life of denial, it’s a life of self-deception. At first, it may be a little easier, but in the end, the understanding will come that you just blew on a festering wound.

So, in order to get out of the pit, you must confess your feelings. Find yourself a “confidant” person and tell him about your disappointments. Write down your thoughts and feelings in a journal. Cry to God, be honest and hard. It may seem that all this is not very logical, but you just follow the path of other believers. Read the Bible more closely, especially the Psalms, Lamentations and the book of Ecclesiastes: there are many such honest doubts, confusion and anger. This kind of honesty is the first step on the road to healing.

Step Two: Notice the Blessings

No matter how bad you feel, no matter how terrible your circumstances, hope dies last. In the very depths of the “pit” it is sometimes difficult to find the right perspective. Life seems more like a curse than a blessing. After all, “everything is not right and everything is wrong.”

But, of course, dwelling on the fact that everything is bad only further distances you from the desired goal of being content. An honest look at your feelings is undoubtedly very important, but it is also important not to stop only at the recognition of their existence. It is necessary to proceed further – to gratitude.

Although it may seem impossible, sit down and think about the good things in your life. Remember Paul’s words in 1 Thessalonians and “give thanks in everything.” God loves you. You have a roof over your head and food on the table. You are alive and still breathing. All your life is still ahead of you. You are stronger than your circumstances. So you will not only survive,, but also become even stronger.

Third step: spend time with family and friends

When it hurts, you want to hide from the whole world, hide from everyone. Communication with others seems like a betrayal of everything that happens inside. It is better to dig deeper into the sofa and dissolve in endless TV programs and serials. But this isolation rarely makes you feel better. In fact, much more often this only makes it worse: disappointments intensify, the mood worsens, and the feeling of loneliness grows with renewed vigor.

That’s why, when you’re in the “pit”, you should definitely spend time with your loved ones. Go for a walk with your spouse. Have lunch with a friend. Call to your brother or sister. Do whatever it takes to get yourself out of the house and into the light of God.

This will not only distract you from your “pit”, it will also become another reminder that life is not only about disappointments. Life can be wonderful and enjoyable sometimes. And the greatest satisfaction comes not from success or achievement, but from love that can be shared with others.

Fourth step: move forward

The worst thing about “falling into a pit” is the loss of motivation. Instead of moving on in life, we begin to sulk in our grief and obsess over our circumstances. We slam on the brakes, stopping the car that propelled us forward. Lost job opportunity makes you think that a new one can no longer be found. Because of the end of the relationship, you do not want to leave the house. You don’t want to go to class because I didn’t pass the exam. Because of a dispute with a spouse, a desire arises “to withdraw into yourself.”

But there is no worse reaction to falling into a pit than this “stagnation”. Because then you will definitely savor your feelings and move nowhere further, left to sit on the side of the road. If you don’t feel like it, keep moving forward. Even if it’s the last thing you want to do, force yourself to take steps and get on with your life. Go on a date with someone else. Send out your resume, go for another interview. Keep looking for an apartment. Attend classes. Strike up a conversation with someone you tried to avoid. Thus, you will be an active participant in life, and not a passive observer.

And no, all these steps do not guarantee a quick improvement in your condition. But they will help you get on the right path to healing, which will come not when your circumstances improve, but when you find hope in God, and in Him alone (Ps. 41:12).

Paul Perkins / christiane.ru

Source: https://ieshua.org/kak-vylezat-iz-yamy.htm