A Texas pastor has warned young Christians not to be guided by Disney movies or Taylor Swift songs when it comes to dating and marriage.
Pastor David Marvin of Watermark Community Church in Dallas, Texas and The Porch youth ministry director in a recent sermon, outlined three common mistakes Christians make during the dating season. He also urged young Christians not to look for advice in Disney movies and Taylor Swift songs.
Marvin called the first mistake “dating nonsense” or believing in “myths” that there is such a thing as “happily ever after” and that dating relationships don’t require hard work.
Pastor noted that once American children can read, think and process information, many of them “learn” about love and dating from the secular world.
“You have been a Disney student since you were 5 years old. This is true. The fairy tale, immortal love, “happily ever after,” was ingrained in our minds as early as childhood,” Marvin said. “I love fairy tales. I love the image of a brave knight in shining armor. But fairy tales lie. Fairy tales teach us that if the shoe fits, then he/she is your ideal, that you will live long and happy. Fairy tales follow the same storyline. There is always a girl in trouble. She must be rescued and you are looking for her, and you will be a knight in shining armor.”
In fact, according to him, a love relationship is not about being a savior or saving someone, but finding a life partner. Marvin noted that contemporary music also replicates “illusions”.
“Taylor Swift has probably taught more people in the world about love than anyone else. Just think about how she shaped us. Every Taylor Swift song says the same thing: “He’s bad for me, but I still like him,” Marvin said, referring to the song “I knew you were trouble.”
Recalling marriage, Marvin said that marriage is one of the “greatest gifts”, but added that there will always be problems and they cannot be avoided.
“Because husbands are called to die daily to their own desires,” he said. “And the same goes with wives.”
According to Marvin, the second common mistake is that many people start dating to fill a void.
“Only God can completely eliminate loneliness,” Marvin added.
“Every person, who has ever been married, quickly realizes that marriage does not free you from loneliness,” Marvin explained. “Marriage cannot eradicate your loneliness, because it is an internal problem at the level of the soul that can only be solved in Christ.”
The pastor warned young people not to date or marry in the hope that their partner would complete them, stating that Christians should approach dating as a “whole person” rather than looking for their “other half”.
“A final common mistake,” according to Marvin, “is to assume that potential partners are responsible for healing you from past pain, trauma, and abuse.”
“What will happen if you do not treat and bandage your wounds? You will bleed and in doing so harm people who have never harmed you,” Marvin warned.
Pastor cited forgiveness as the key to healing past pain and fighting “toxic habits” such as eating disorders, pornography addiction and others.
“One of the things you have to do is forgive the people who hurt you,” Marvin concluded. – “Deal with these toxic habits now. Because marriage does not get rid of them. It only strengthens them.”